Cousint trouble

[Tew21]

Me and my cus are good friends but lately things have been diffrent. We've been talking slot more and video chatting. I think that she might like me as more then family. I don't know how to feel about her. What should I do?

[lcsoman0117]

Me and my cus are good friends but lately things have been diffrent. We've been talking slot more and video chatting. I think that she might like me as more then family. I don't know how to feel about her. What should I do?

Make it crystal clear that you two are family, before it gets worse.

[Tew21]

The problem is she suffers from sever deppresion and she's cut befor. I don't want to be the reason she cuts an i don't want her to do something even more harmful if it turns out she does like me and I tell her I don't feel the same way

[lcsoman0117]

The problem is she suffers from sever deppresion and she's cut befor. I don't want to be the reason she cuts an i don't want her to do something even more harmful if it turns out she does like me and I tell her I don't feel the same way

Why would she?
Just stay close friends, but dont let things progress, and if she tries to progress, tell her it cant happen...

it's incest
you're uncomfortable with it

[nickw_2013]

Me and my cus are good friends but lately things have been diffrent. We've been talking slot more and video chatting. I think that she might like me as more then family. I don't know how to feel about her. What should I do?
Could you please clarify what "talking slot" means?

If you really think that she likes you as more than family, then you need to set very clear boundry lines between you two. I don't mean like issolate her, just make it very clear that you two are just family and that is all you're willing to be.
However, if you might have feelings for her, you have to be able to accept everyting that would go along with 'dating' her. Many people, actually a majority of people, from upon incest. Even though it may be legal in some places to marry a cousin, it is still very much frowned upon. Hope this helps,
-Nick

[lcsoman0117]

Could you please clarify what "talking slot" means?


-Nick
I think he mean's "alot"

[Tew21]

Alright but is it alright if I leave this forum open?

Could you please clarify what "talking slot" means?

If you really think that she likes you as more than family, then you need to set very clear boundry lines between you two. I don't mean like issolate her, just make it very clear that you two are just family and that is all you're willing to be.
However, if you might have feelings for her, you have to be able to accept everyting that would go along with 'dating' her. Many people, actually a majority of people, from upon incest. Even though it may be legal in some places to marry a cousin, it is still very much frowned upon. Hope this helps,
-Nick

A lot



MERGED DUE TO DOUBLE POST; PLEASE USE EDIT BUTTON

[nickw_2013]

Yes, it might be a wise idea to leave this forum open for now. We have a very good counselor on here, IAMSAM, that should find this. He gives very good advice and is always more than willing to help!

[Tew21]

Could you please clarify what "talking slot" means?

If you really think that she likes you as more than family, then you need to set very clear boundry lines between you two. I don't mean like issolate her, just make it very clear that you two are just family and that is all you're willing to be.
However, if you might have feelings for her, you have to be able to accept everyting that would go along with 'dating' her. Many people, actually a majority of people, from upon incest. Even though it may be legal in some places to marry a cousin, it is still very much frowned upon. Hope this helps,
-Nick


Ya it's illegal were I live and I know it's wrong

[lcsoman0117]

Alright but is it alright if I leave this forum open?

please do

[IAMSAM]

*Whoosh* Here I am! (Although I must say, Trae and Nick really do have this one under control).

First, I wonder what she's doing that actually gives you the idea she 'likes you' more than a cousin? Are you sure it's not the other way around? Maybe you're finding you're having feelings about her?

In either event, as the guys here have so rightly said, it shouldn't go further than it is, the consequences are really unimaginable. Especially if she has a history of self harm. So, do whatever needs to be done to make sure that you guys don't cross the line. And if you find yourselves getting close, just back away, use a little humor if you need to, but don't 'go there' regardless of how tempting it might be.

It's not uncommon to be curious by family members, nor is it uncommon to be aroused by them. The combo of hormones and eyeballs, they'll do it every time! As long as you keep it private and in your head, you're OK.

With regards to her cutting, it's important to be aware that she has a history of this (probably under stress), and that you and she especially want to stay away from those topics or *things* that create (or could potentially create) stress for her. BUT, if she talks about cutting, or being really stressed out, you have to tell her that you're telling your folks so that the adults can be aware of her situation and help her. So, you should be simulatneously avoiding those things which could lead her to cut, and also telling your adults when you believe that she is in danger.